Are you like me a single woman? Have you ever thought about looking for love online?

Many many moons ago back in the 90′s..Yes that long ago I was young, naive and foolish and so I joined a penpal site back in the mid 90′s when the internet was still in its infancy. There were no sites like Match or POF yet. Well it was on that penpal site I meet my now ex husband. It was novel to so many people, online dating that is, that it even made for a newspaper article.

You see I met a man from the US, moved there, married him, gave birth to a beautiful daughter there..and then in well blew up..but that happens sometimes.

After my divorce I took some time off from men. I didn’ t date. I was busy licking my wounds and taking care of my infant daughter, and then my dad died and then my mother got sick so who had time for dating..not me.

Then Rachel got diagnosed and she needed me quite a bit so my dating life again took a back burner. I went years at a time without even a date. I know some may be asking how did you survive, without a man’s touch. Well trust me it was more then missed.

Recently with everything stable in my life and in my daughter’s too my thoughts once again turned to wanting that someone special. But where is a mom blogger going to meet a good man? My social circles are made up of mostly women, and you definitely won’t find me hitting on anyone’s husband.

So I went online.

Don’t Gasp.

I put my profile out there..yikes you think.

What did I find? What have I seen?

Well first I saw some are just looking for sexual encounters–I am not. That is not me, yes sex is great but for me that is not all I am looking for. I want a genuine good guy. Someone I can be me with, have great conversations, play and tease and well spend time with. Is that too much to want these days? Is it too much to want a real relationship?

I also found a few good men who I thought I might connect with went on a few dates, and well I found there are a few good guys out there..and some frogs.

Have I found my good guy, time will tell.

Literally I do want to find love, and someone I can share life with, and to know if that is the case takes time.

Would you ever consider online dating and if you did tell me how did it go for you?

It has been a pretty fabulous weekend for my daughter and I, it was filled with time together laughing, playing, creating and simply having a good time. That is what long weekends are for right? Our Victoria Day Weekend was a good time together.

Friday night we started visiting our old neighborhood in Scarborough as I needed new eye glasses and one of the best and cheapest places in Toronto is in Scarborough. We love the Eye Emporium..did you know you can get a complete set of glasses for $29. After that we visited one of our favorite Chinese food places.

Saturday we cleaned, did homework, laundry and I finally organized my closet while Rachel teased me about how much stuff I had in this one closet! We worked hard this Saturday, but we had a purpose.

SUNDAY was Play day! One thing in getting me and Rachel both healthier I have realized is the importance of play time. We need the down time and we need to enjoy life a bit, so we headed on out and hit Canada’s Wonderland. We again got seasons passes so this was our first trip for the season. If your family loves Amusement Parks as much as my teen, visit 3 times in the season and well you more then make up the price of a pass.

Today was a day for resting, and relaxing and getting ready for camp. My teen and her classmates are getting ready to spend the remainder of the week at camp.

How did you spend Victoria Day? What memories did you create this weekend?

My Teen One Year Later!

Yesterday was a day of tears for me, but they were tears of absolute joy and gratitude. Even this morning I am so full of thanks. You see my dear teen has gone from being in a hospital bed after a mental health crisis, and a mental health diagnosis that she may have to live with throughout her life, to being an honor roll student with several friends, all in one year.

It has been a very difficult year especially at the beginning but I am so grateful for the incredible team we put together to get my daughter healthy. From friends who gave great advice and were rocks of support, to an employer who switched my hours as needed for hospital visits and often let me work from home so I could be with my daughter, to the medical team we put together for her. I want to say a very special Thank you to all who have been part of this path with us.

When you are addressing any kind of a health challenge I have learned one of the most important things you can do is get a great team behind you, supporting you and encouraging you along the way. Yes I can to be chief cheerleader, advocate, and coach but there are so many of you that were a blessed part of team Rachel. Thank you!

To my friends who kept me sane and healthy as I helped my daughter, thank you.

To the wonderful Jamie and Maria, her first teacher and EA on this journey Thank you.

To Ed Schild at the Regesh Center and Dr Michelle Marshall, Thank you.

To our online friends who often asked about my teen, who sent love and prayers, Thank you.

It has been a long year but I would do it all again in a heart beat, to get my teen to where she is a happy healthy honor roll student.

Most of all my daughter has been brave, fierce and amazing to watch on this journey. Today I just want to celebrate, and part of that is Thank you.

This weekend I got to spend a wonderful weekend spending some time connecting with some pretty cool friends and fellow bloggers. After an event fell through many of my friends put together their talents and with the kindness and generosity of the Renaissance Hotel we had a weekend long tweet up. The primary topic that for me kept getting high lighted was the importance of taking care of you. As moms, business women, daughters, volunteers etc our lives get so full and everyone else gets fueled and filled but sometimes we are running on empty and well we need to take care of ourselves.

The weekend was great fun. Before we gathered at the meeting room a bunch of us caught up in the Arriba Restaurant and the yam fries were yummy. Then we went down for an afternoon of laughter and tears for me. My friends Mara and Julie both spoke.

Mara has girls just like me, and her fresh perspective always makes me think twice. Julie well she had me in tears. She took us through this exercise and even sharing my answers took bravery on my part. You see she talked about the things that block us. One of my biggest things that is blocking me in walking this healthier path is fear. Parts of it terrifies me if I am honest, and it is that realization that had me with tears in my eyes.

Then Meghan Graham spoke on being the mom of 3 with Autism. What an amazing woman! I was reminded so much that going with the gut was the correct way to go when parenting and advocating for my teen daughter.

After 3 great sessions it was time for a break, I went back to the bar in the Arriba restaurant and had the very best bread pudding I have ever tasted. I also took some time to take in the hunky ball players who were in batting practice.

Then it was up to Julie and Christine’s room for a pizza party supplied by the wonderful team at Mom Central Canada. And great sweets made by Candy Coated Sweets.

After hanging with the lovely ladies, I headed home since home is a hop skip and jump from the hotel.

The next day we gathered at Tim Hortons for breakfast and then walked over to the hotel for a morning of shared experiences again. Cherie-Lynn Buchanan was up first speaking about taking care of you and being the beautiful you. I fell more in love with her on Saturday. Then the wonderful Julie Cole had me in stitches as she doled out some practical advice on how to be a master juggler. Then my friend Wendy doled out some great car safety tips, and I realized how grateful I am that I took car safety seriously when Rachel was younger.

After a great morning together a few of us took our afternoon back to the restaurant where we ate lunch and watched a great game of baseball. It was wonderful that the Blue Jays won 5-0. After the game it was cute to watch the Jr Jays run the bases, some of them were just so wee little.

This weekend was about me time and learning to take care of me. I promise from now on I need to take care of me more and to plan this very important time. You can’t really fuel others if you aren’t fueled yourself.

Thanks to the wonderful Julie, Katie and Christine for throwing this together.

I remember like it was yesterday, my daughter’s grade one teacher told me plain and simple teaching my daughter was hell. That was the beginning of really learning about Autism. My young daughter back then had many of the symptoms of the autism. She would chew her clothing, rock, had so many sensitivities that it was hard to keep track some days. It was a very scary time as we were also just recovering from a devastating fire so I wasn’t sure what might be a reaction to the fire ( my daughter and I both witnessed a young woman burning to death as our apartment complex was in the midst of burning to the ground). It was a very scary time.

Asperger’s Syndrome is high functioning autism, and the rate at which kids in Canada are being diagnosed are increasing every year. Because these kids are so smart, they are often misdiagnosed either being diagnosed with ADHD, and another diagnosis along side it, like OCD, ODD and so many more. But the key to knowing if it is Aspergers is the extreme trouble with social situations. This is my daughter.

For years I have believed that my now teen daughter has Aspergers, because she is over the age of 12 no one will actually give that diagnosis. They instead have given her a list to live with. Many of which go hand in hand with kids with Autism and this remains common in the world that is Autism and especially Aspergers Syndrome.

My teen on an average day can show signs of ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder, ODD, and OCD, as well as having an inability to take in social interactions well.

As a mother who has battled and advocated for her daughter since she first showed signs after a major regression in skills when she was 4, I have battle for services and for her to get the supports that she would need to be a healthy teen.

Parenting a child who has Autism is hard work, but there are so many rewards as well. When they get a new skill after much coaching you take in a deep breath, and smile. When you watch them make a friend, a real friend, it brings tears to your eyes and the first time they really look at you well your heart wants to melt.

On this World Autism Day I encourage to talk to the parents of autistic kids, get the facts, and lets work on getting these kids the support they need as there is still a very long way to go here in Canada.

My Teen One Year Later!

One year later and I don’t feel so Wordless, I feel like celebrating and dancing. It has been a LONG exhausting road to health but my teen is well on her way.

She had to endure much over that year: first it was daily check ins with a crisis team as we waited for a hospital bed, a hospital stay, and 10 months of not being in a classroom in the TDSB. Yeah, I know most teens would think of that as an extended vacation but my teen missed the classroom, she was aching to learn.

Her health is now stable which I am thankful for and well her teachers at her new school all love and are thrilled to have her in the classroom. We won’t talk about her grades which continue to amaze her mom ( high 80′s and 90′s across the board).  She is making friends and thriving. It has been a long hard fought battle for her and for me as her advocate but each day I draw strength from my teen. She has done the work, she has pushed through every barrier that was thrown at her, and she is well and happy.

What more could a mom ask for? Nothing!

I have my happy confident teen and for that I am more grateful then words can express.

For any parents who are struggling to get their teen diagnosed with a mental health issue, don’t give, don’t quit, the path is long and hard but push and push some more because here in Ontario there is no one else doing it. My teen pulled through, but so many teens today don’t.

I have been told by my teens doctors and teachers that she is a rare success story and I am grateful every day that she is, because one year ago I almost lost her and today well I just want to celebrate her!