I have been going through some major Mom guilt lately.

I have a teen who has an undiagnosed illness. She has spent since March 27th, out of school as she awaits a hospital bed so we can get a diagnosis, so she can get assessed properly by the specialists that she needs to see. There is a shortage of beds for kids/teens like my daughter here in the city where I live (Toronto).

It has left me feeling guilty, that I did not take action sooner. That I did not advocate harder, faster, stronger.  The hardest part of these 2 months has been the waiting, as our life as we know it is on hold as we await this hospital bed.

There is nothing harder then parenting a child when you don’t know what more you can do. When you aren’t mom enough.

Every day that we wait, I struggle more, I simply want answers for my daughter. The waiting is the hardest. Fear and worry invade each and every day. I feel I am not mom enough. I pray for the strength I need to get through, and to help her through as the days have been dark.

We simply want answers, is that too much to ask? Is that too much for a mom to ask? Till I have them, till I know, I do not feel like I am mom enough.

For those of who are wondering my daughter has been having some serious mental health issues that really began to surface after I moved back to Toronto, after she had been badly bullied for 2 years in Nova Scotia. But there is more to the story..a lot more as appointments with 3 specialists have told us that she needs a Neuro specialist. So we really do not know what is bringing on the mental health issues, and we need to know. A teen deserves her health, and to be in school. Doctors will not allow her to go to school till we know the full scope of what is going on with her, and in the meantime she is missing her friends.

For me her mom I am challenged, worried, and fearful because each week that the diagnosis is delayed I see my daughter slipping away from me, and since I can not do anything to stop it I feel I am not mom enough. I am trying hard to be strong, to keep her and me both occupied as we wait but each day it is getting harder. Whoever said waiting is easy lied, it is one of the hardest things to do especially when you are searching for answers as a parent.

Have you ever felt not mom enough?

1. Phd in Parenting if you want to read someone with an opinion who will make you stop and think you must read Annie. I have adored Annie for years and yes some of my posts have come and been linked to posts on her site, because she made me stop and think.

2. @BoydJane Jane is another blogger who makes you stop and think, she writes about things that will encourage you, inspire you. I like that about her.

3. 5 minutes for Mom Okay this blog has more then one mom writing. Susan and Janice are sisters that I have adored for years. A couple of years ago I even guest posted on a hot topic over here.

4. Gail Vazoxlade Gail is a  mom and smart savvy money woman has been a guiding force in my life in more ways then she knows. Two of my favorite days in the last year both involved Gail.

5. Mortgages for Women This blog is written by one of my dearest friends. Marcy is a great woman to connect with if you want money to make sense. One of the smartest women I know, and she can be funny too.

6. A Peek inside the Fishbowl Andrea is a wonderful mom blogger from Ottawa, who really does give us a look inside the fishbowl. I have loved the peek into her life for years.

7. Globetrotting Mama Heather is just finsihing traveling the world for a year with her husband and 2 boys in tow, and it has made me dream of travel more then one night.

8. Be Nice or Leave is written by my friend Mara. She has teens in the house so I can relate to her posts quite often.

9.Speed Skating Mom writes to that athlete in me. Sharon is a great writer and mom who I love to read.

10.Mother Bumper Sometimes a picture says a thousand words. I love following Katie’s photos.

11. Half Soled Boots Shan is a newer find of mine, and I absolutely adore her introspection.

12. Sweet Potato Chronciles is another new find of mine, I love Ceri. If you are looking to read about food I suggest you start here.

13.Attack of the Redneck Mommy I think everyone I know already reads Tanis. I have been for years, and can relate in so so many ways.

14. Cheaper then Therapy is where I go when I need to smile or laugh, Ali has a way of getting me to do that.

15. The Kitchen Magpie. I love Karlynn’s kitchen. I first found this blog while judging the Weblog Awards earlier this year and fell in love with it. I think you will too.

16. Cheaty Monkey. I love reading Haley’s posts. Lately she has not been writing near enough.

17. Sarah Bessey is a christian mom, and she writes about a spirit filled life. While I no longer practice Christianity i love her blog.

18. Organized Junkie I have loved Laura’s blog for years. She helps keep me organized and if you ever need a recipe do visit her on Mondays for Menu Monday.

19. Shasherlife I first met Shannon before I read her blog, we met as we sat side by side at the first ShesConnected Conference 2 years ago.

20. Nummie’s Blog I love reading Alison’s blog. She simply makes me smile.

21. Playground Confidental Rebecca’s blog also makes me smile. She is the mom of 3 who is juggling it all.

22. Life is a Blog is another girlfriend of mine. I love that Trina too has teens!

23. Mapsgirl is also a friend and I love Wendy’s blog. Another place I read when I want to smile.

24. Sober Julie is just an inspiration and a great read when you need a boost.

25. The Cheeky Goat Joy is from Halifax and I love how she writes. She is an atheist, yet does discuss faith somewhat, she helps me to broaden my own spiritual perspectives.

I hope that each mom enjoys this Mother’s Day and may it give her something more to write about!

Last year we bought our very first Coldstone Creamery Cake it was a bunny, just like these.

There have been a few more occasions since where we have celebrated with a Coldstone Creamery Cake. Who doesn’t love a good cake? or cupcakes? and yes Coldstone has those too. Here are some of our favorites.

Doesn’t it look yummy?

Another favorite in this house is cupcakes. Here is another favorite, and it is so chocolatey!

Now about the giveaway, it is being hosted by 2 local franchise store: 644 Dixon road and 1094 Bloor St. west. We hang at the Bloor St location. If you win you must pick up your cake at one of these 2 locations.

Here are some facts about what Coldstone offers.

Below are some details and pricing:

ice cream cupcakes: package of 6 is $12.49

ice cream cookie sandwich: package of 4 is $11.49

ice cream pies (serves up to 10) $13.99

Cold Stone at home: 16oz $6.99 32oz $8.99

Birthday Cakes:

small 6″ round serves up to 8 $22.99

large 8″ round servesup to 12 $31.99

small 8″x12″ rectangle serves up to 25 $41.99

Large 12″x18″ rectangle serves up to 50 $51.99

Signature Cakes

small 6″ round serves up to 8 $24.99

large 8″ round serves up to 12 $33.99

small 8″x12″ rectangle serves up to 25 $43.99

Large 12″x18″ rectangle serves up to 50 $53.99

So the cakes are made at the store and can usually be made within 24-48 hrs. You can add customization which is free. Now to enter the contest I am again using Rafflecopter and will be letting the winner know on May10th so they can order a cake in time for Mother’s Day.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Years later, friends have used Ronald McDonald House in times of crisis in their children’s lives. When you live far from the hospital it is always great to have a caring place that you can lay your head. Did you know over 10,000 Canadian families have been helped by Ronald McDonald Charities?

Now thanks to efforts locally Toronto has a brand new Ronald McDonald House. I can’t wait till next month when I actually will be visiting it, with a team of bloggers. But before I get to the house there is McHappy Day next week, Wednesday May 2.

Go have lunch, take the kids. $1 from every Big Mac, McHappy Meal, and coffee goes to support Ronald McDonald House Charities.There are 13 almost 14 houses across Canada that need our support, and if you can’t go you can still show your support for this great cause because of the 364 Days of Giving campaign by texting MCHAPPY to 30333 to make a $5 donation to RMHC. To receive #McHappyDay updates from across the country, follow McDonald’s Canada on Twitter (www.twitter.com/McD_Canada).

Cleaning © by go_greener_oz

It is that time of year again when we are all thinking about spring cleaning. There are many ways to save as you clean, and to clean up your finances as well. I did my own spring cleaning a few weeks ago, and you know what I even found that I had too much stuff, and I had a wee bit of a mess on my hands. So it was time to get things in order.

We all love when we can have clean homes, both financially and physically.

There are some pretty simple ways to have both.

1. First Get Rid of the Clutter. A messy home whether it is financial or physically simply distracts us, and who can really enjoy clutter for long? So the first order of business is a freebie and doesn’t cost a dime, it simply costs you some time. Get organized.

• Money wise: Do you have a filing system and in and out system, so everything is getting paid on time and so you do not have late fees? If not create one.
• House wise: Clean the crap. Get rid of that old stuff you are hanging on too. If you haven’t used it in a year, donate it to a charity. ( We did this ourselves last week.)

2. Money wise do a spring bill audit. Take a look at your bills, are there services you are not using? Does your provider have a new cheaper option that could be saving you money? Is there a competitor that could provide you the same service, and quality at less cost? Time to check.

3. House wise. When was the last time you had the gas or electric company out to do an audit on your home? Get a House audit done. Many companies have great programs that even allow you to receive a tax credit.You could end up saving big.

4. Time to take a look at the waste in your house. As you clean the fridge next look at your food waste. Could you manage your grocery bills better with a bit of meal planning? There are many great helps out there to help you stay on task. Personally once a week we have leftover night, to make sure waste is limited.

5. So we got things tidier above so now it is time to clean. Have you ever looked at the price of cleaners? Did you know there are so many ways you can make your own homemade cleaners on the cheap. I have a board on Pinterest that is full of money saving tips and several are recipes for your own cleaners, I challenge you to try one, and let me know how it goes.

6. Now the house is clean, time to venture out, but wait before we hop into a car how about take alternative transportation this spring as a way to save. Take a walk, ride your bike, or even hop onto local transit instead of taking your car. The spring and summer are a great time to choose healthier frugal transportation methods.

These are just six simple ways to help reduce your costs this spring, I am sure you can think of others. How about sharing your favorite spring cleaning tips that help you save at the same time?

Back in 2004 they did issue Rachel a one year card, during that time I was to get her citizenship card. We had a fire, ID was lost. Because of 911, laws and rules around ID changed both here and in the United States where Rachel was born. I was able to replace her birth certificate that listed me as her mom but not her SSN card. I have her immunization records, I have her school records, I get the Canada Tax Credit for her every month but I do not have enough ID to get the Citizenship card as I can not take her across the border to acquire the necessary second piece. She is not 16 she has no photo ID. She has no passport. AS all require 2 pieces of ID, I only have 1, the one that lists me the Canadian as her mother(thus she is born with automatic Canadian citizenship). Without the card now, the province refuses to issue Rachel a health card. I am literally a mom caught between 2 government offices, trying to get my daughter what she needs. She needs the care of a specialist, this has been determined by the crisis team that visited my home last week from Youthdale. Rachel is on their priority list for a bed in their program, but she can not  get that bed without a health card.

What would you do if you could not get your child healthcare? Have you thought about it at all?  Healthcare is something we even give refugees coming into Canada, but here the child of a Canadian who can’t get her daughter help. Does that seem right? If anyone knows how I can get Rachel her cards I would appreciate the assistance. I HAVE been battling this for years, I am appealing now the the General Manager who over sees health cards, but due governmental policy it is likely Rachel will once again be refused  until I get her citizenship card, and that process could take months when she needs health care now. Suggestions? What would you do if your child needed expensive healthcare? Rachel needs to be assessed properly and she needs a hospital bed to do so. I am a mom at the end of my rope. What would you do? I am simply appealing and once again writing URGENT letters and praying she stays stable while we wait.

* happy ending to this story

A reader of this post, a MPP’s assistant, pointed the Ministry of Health’s Kingston office to my blog post. Sue Graham read it. She is now my new BFF as within 30 minutes of me faxing Rachel’s birthcertificate, and other supporting ID, I had Rachel health card number in my hand. She is mailing Rachel’s actual card, but as of 10 am this morning Rachel has health coverage. So now the wait for the priority bed, which should take a week or two.

The Kinder ‘A Joy to Share’ campaign is supporting Children’s Miracle Network member hospitals, and you can too, by purchasing KINDER® Seasonal Easter Products. There are some great items to choose from like the KINDER® Egg Hunt Kit and several more. We love the large seasonal egg and the little lambs that are part of the seasonal offerings.

“Children’s Miracle Network® raises funds for 170 children’s hospitals, 14 of which are in Canada. These hospitals, in turn, use the money where it’s needed the most. When a donation is given, it stays in the community, ensuring that every dollar is helping local kids. Since 1983, Children’s Miracle Network has raised more than $4 billion, most of it $1 at a time. These donations have gone to support research and training, purchase equipment, and pay for uncompensated care, all in support of our mission to save and improve the lives of as many children as possible.”

Kinder this year on the Facebook Page, have shared many of the stories of children who have been helped by the children hospitals. Hayden`s story of asthma spoke to my heart especially as I have several friends who have kids with asthma. Miracle moms share there stories, and they are so heartfelt, such a blessing to read. You can also contribute as well right there on Facebook. The Facebook page is also a great place to share your own stories.

Remember as you are out shopping this week, the Kinder seasonal line and the money raised for such a great cause.

Just a side note Kinder Canada can now be found on Twitter and you can follow them there.

Very proud to say I am a KinderMom and do get special perks for being one, but as always the thoughts here are my own.

Then Saturday a little more perspective came my way as I sat at the Canadian Sufi Cultral Center. These 79 families have adopted an entire village of 2,000 who have been eating about one meal a day if that in landlocked Burkina Faso. By giving simply $50 a month a Canadian family here is feeding a family of 5-10 there for a month. A month. This project was featured in the Toronto Star a few Sundays ago. There is still the need to help these families so yes our dollars can matter. That coffee run that isn’t done can turn into real help for a family. If you care to give to the project and my prayer is you do you can visit jerrahi.ca
.

Whether is be money for water or food, there is alot you can do to help somone else out? Did you know even a donation locally to your local foodbank can go to help another family locally. How often do our kids complain about this gadget or that? about needing the latest brand? Parents what about you? For that last $500 you spent for that weekend away, you could of feed many for months.

How often do we get caught up in the materialism that makes up so much of our culture where we look for the freebie, the swag, the easy way. We need to be teaching our kids so much better. I am so thankful that my teen is getting it, and even though we don’t have alot we can give we find ways to give. Even if you do not have a dollar you can give you can still give love, time, a smile, a prayer of hope. All of those are acts of charity that we can all do no matter the perpective that we take.

Then today. I watched this song.

Did you know even today months after the floods that devasted Pakistan children are dying every single day from starvation?
Puts it into perspective doesn’t it?
There is much we COULD do here. Now what are you willing to do today? 25,000 die every day waiting for a little help.

There are many many organizations that can make great use of your money today if you can give, and if you can’t financially there are other ways you can give.
So how about using this fresh perspective to do a little good today. Help a family live. Help a family drink clean water. All it takes is a simple change in perspective and a dig into your wallet. Rachel and I have talked about it. She is giving up 25% of her allowance and I am matching her to feed a family for a month, every month. We are also looking to live lives that help us keep the persective of how blessed we really are.

Bathroom Scale © by -Paul H-

Way back when, that was January, I wrote a blog post about wanting to create, connect and cultivate this year. Those where the three words I have been using to guide this year of mine.

Part of the creating is creating a healthier me. I set some goals. I want to look healthy and be healthy before Blogher, and YES I am finally going! I even have a wonderful roommate, MarocMama.

So to keep myself accountable I am going to share each Friday between now and Blogher how my journey to health is going. So far I am down 25 pounds. Since Jan 1. I joined a gym, and no I have not been there every day. I need to get better at that. I did take advantage of a sweet deal and got a trainer who hooked me up and helped me jump start my journey.

So I am creating a new and healthier me, are you trying to get healthy this year? If so what are you trying? What is working for you and what isn’t?

budget © by 401K

We all want that get out of jail free card when we play Monopoly but the reality of life is there is no get out of jail free card. There are consequences that come up in life. One of the biggest consequences Canadians are facing today is debt. We are taking on more and more debt, and seriously we are not getting a great handle on it. Do you know according to a recent Canadian Living article almost half a million Canadians are behind on their credit card bills by more then 90 days! That number is huge. We do not need a get out of jail card to fix the problem. We need a plan.

So what do you do when you find yourself buried in debt, YOU, have to have a PLAN!

1.First OWN your debt.

List it all out. Know how much you owe, and where. Know the amount of interest you are paying each month. You dug the hole, and now you need to know how deep it is.

2. Pay HIGHEST interest rate first and more often.

You want to get rid of that interest rate. Why spend what you work hard for on interest, so tackle this first. The more you can lower your interest payments the better for you.

3. TRACK your spending.

You need to know how you got to this hole in the first place. Track your spending for 90 days. Look at your habits. Do you go out for lunch often, shop for junk or do other things that are driving your debt load higher.

4. Set a BUDGET.

In our world today there are many ways you can set a budget. Use paper and pencil, software or even an app. All of these can help you as you learn to budget your money.

5. Get HELP if you need it.

I had to go so far as to speak to a bankruptcy trustee. There are people out there who can help you get through the dark days of debt, and trust me living debt free is so so much better. If you need help, ask, don’t be ashamed. I learned a lot going through my bankruptcy.